When I introduce myself to people out here, and they ask me where I come from, invariably say I'm Californian. I say this reflexively without unpacking what it means like so many Americans who think the world is just jumbled collection of US colonies, clumsily and without revealing the relevance of such a statement. Then they ask more questions ,dig deeper, and find things that surprise them, little arcs in turn in the labyrinth of me that surprise them and haunt me for days in reflection.
I was born in Compton. Which only means I was born in another one of the places that you could call a US colony. When I tell Americans this they blink and their eyes widen. Like when I tell English people I studied at UEA. Around 20 percent of the black men my age back home are either incarcerated dead or have a prison record and many don't finish high school or let alone attend college. Most of the black men I met in Norwich England, while I attended UEA, were African exchange students. There the only threat to their mortality were STD's and binge drinking.
When people ask me why I never joined a gang, robbed folks, or fell prey to the Los Angeles police force, I tell them it was boring. Everyone else around me thought that type of thing was there only option. They thought this because Compton is actually a really boring place, with no money coming into the community and the nothing more entertaining around than a theatre, a car show and a barbecue.
The other reason is I like books. I like thoughts. I like people and even though these things exist in Compton they live there in a very constrained way.
So I left. I moved with my family to Long beach and struggled through City College while working got two Associate degrees and then went to San Francisco State University after winning a writing Scholarship in a chance to go Abroad to finish my Bachelors which I did. Sometimes I'm surprised about where I ended up but not because I'm black. I'm surprised because no expected me to do it.
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